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Thursday, August 20, 2009

NOT part of the Fairy Tale

See this little Cheezer?

This is the same little Cheezer that I live for. I adore. I share my heart with and pour every ounce of love into. My sweet Elaina.

Without warning, without explanation and without cause, this sweet, darling daughter of mine has warped into an absolute brat. Did I really just call my child a "brat?" This time : YES.

I'm not sure if the planets are out of alignment, maybe the air is a little too thick or maybe I'm just due for some cruel twist of fate. Whatever the case might be, Elaina has been bad. Like B-A-D bad.

It wasn't even a slow progression either. Along about 3 weeks ago, we had been running in a crazy-typical-busy-but-structured fashion and her behavior seemed to indicate that she was overly tired and needed a break. We slowed down, made earlier bedtimes and exhausted every bit of patience with her to see her through her rough patch. Every day that following seemed to amplify more misbehaving and more attitude. While I don't know every one's view on spanking kids, (and this is not the time nor place for a full justification or debate) but the only thing that seemed to slow her down, get her attention and curb her behavior was a firm swat on her bottom. She's gotten more swats in three weeks than she's had in her lifetime. She's already told me that she likes going to time-out and staring her in the eye (with a firm grasp on her arm) and sternly explaining the necessity to STOP her bout-of-crazy, eventually became ineffective.

To try to better explain what exactly it is that we've had such problems with is likely vast and ever changing. Basically, it's the fact that she has been taking deliberate actions to intentionally defy and disobey us and do things that she already knows are wrong. And that she seems to take such pleasure in knowing that she is being defiant. And then does more. All this with the added bonus of a teenage-sized attitude. If she's seemingly run out of leads to get in trouble, then she turns on Lincoln and SQUEEZES him and hugs him so hard or plays with him so rough that she thinks she ought NOT to get into trouble because she "is just loving him."

I can't even begin to explain what a toll this has taken on me. Each day I wake up believing that it will be a fresh start and then I get more of the same and sometimes even before work which is just GREAT! I have been missing my sweet daughter and it has torn me up that she has been acting so crazy. Each night I lay in bed with her and we try to talk about her day and the things that make us happy. I've talked to her, encouraged her and praised her. Sometimes I can just about my see my words slipping right out of her ears as she convinces me that the "good Elaina" will soon come back.

As of tonight, I'm happy (blessed) (overjoyed) (proud) (excited) to report that Elaina seems to be on an upswing. The past three nights have been successful without incident and without attitude. Thank you Sweet Jesus! In turn, I have done my share of praising her and reminding her of all of things she is doing right and how much I love her nice words. And how much I have missed her sweet self. I'm not sure what kind of crazy she had going on but I am more than relieved to see us all on the other side and that she seems to have literally snapped back into the little girl I know and love so much.

Is this what you would call growing pains? If so, I'd like to order the antidote right now. Monthly installments, please.

1 Welcome Comments:

Kelsey said...

Two and a half to three and a half seems to have been our most difficult stretch so far w/ Harper. Things are generally improved now but we still have those swings once in a while. Even the good ones go through it from time to time. :-)